Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Chicken Thief... caught in action!

Red Alert

Red Alert!

So, last night I was laying in bed reading a book...

and I heard what I thought sounded like a card board box being tossed around... I figured it was the kids goofing off and went back to reading. But then, I heard it again... followed by my girls clucking their little chicken hearts out. Knowing EXACTLY what was happening, I JUMPED out of bed and turned the back porch light on... and saw Mr. Ricky Raccoon with his creepy claws on the Eglu...
"He's BAAAACK." I shouted... waking the handsome husband from his beauty...errr man sleep.

Apparently this clever raccoon is an old pro... he just stood there next to the Eglu and starred right back at me.

So what did I do to scare him off?

Like an idiot I opened a window and clapped my hands at him....

(in a VERY THREATENING way I might add)

What did the handsome husband do?

Well... after yelling expletives in a very disgusted high maintenance suburbia I can't believe this is actually happening to me voice (part disbelief and part willing the raccoon to hurry up and eat the chickens so his misery of being know as the man who is married to the cheap crazy woman on the block who grows vegetables and keeps chickens would be over).

He grabbed Monkey Boys "Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle" and went out to investigate... in his pajama's non the less.

And then proceed to pelt Mr Ricky Raccoon with bb's...

Which didn't do anything at first...

but after a few minutes he finally scampered off..

And the handsome husband went back to bed...

I couldn't believe it...

"You're going back to bed?...
What about my chickens???"

Then finally... he let out a big "I HATE THOSE CHICKENS... THEY ARE A PAIN IN THE ASS! You need to get ride of those things... they are like bait sitting out there...it's ridiculous ...Nobody in here (the neighborhood) has chickens... if you wanted chickens I would of bought you a farm..."


I LOVE my birds...


(note to self: remember the "I would of bought you a farm" comment...
and use it next time he brings up moving.

Always thinkin' Mavis... always thinkin'.


So then I threw on my coat and headed outside to check on my girls... and begrudgingly the handsome husband followed me...


The girls were fine... though a bit skittish as I tried to coax them back into their Eglu...but finally they went in... and nestled back into their straw chicken beds for the night...

And then I noticed the problem... I think...

When I had closed the door last night apparently it didn't "lock"... there was a bunch of dirt and straw caked in the slot ... and knowing that the handsome husband wasn't going to stand out there for much longer ...in the dark... in his pajama's... in the 30 degree weather...while I cleaned it out... I used a stick to close the girls in tight for the night...

Later today I will go out and clean out the dirt from around the door.


Soooo... does anybody know any good raccoon recipes?

Because next time...

Mr. Ricky is not going to live to tell about it.


  1. The farm thing sounds interesting.:) I'm still chuckling about the "Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle."

    Perhaps you could post a copy of this recipe on the chickens igloo...

    Bar-B-Q'd Raccoon -

    ~ 4 - 6 lb. raccoon, cut into serving pieces
    ~ 1 cup red wine
    ~ 2 onions, sliced
    ~ 3 bay leaves
    ~ 1 tbsp salt
    ~ 1 tsp pepper
    ~ 3 cloves garlic, sliced
    ~ 2 cups of your favorite barbecue sauce
    ~ 1 tbsp paprika

    Place the raccoon pieces in a large pan. Add the wine, onions, bay leaves, salt, pepper and garlic. Add enough water to cover the meat.

    Bring to a boil. Cover and simmer for 1 hour.

    After 1 hour, remove the meat and drain. Place the raccoon in a greased baking dish. Mix the barbecue sauce and paprika together and pour over the meat.

    Cook at 325 degrees for 50 - 60 minutes.

    Serve and Enjoy!

  2. What drama!

    At least your hubby had on pajamas---my dad used to shoot deer in his Fruit of the Looms.

  3. Mr. H... That's Awesome! I will be laminating the recipe and sticking it to the Eglu.

    MamaJJ... Now that would be a sight!

  4. Oy. Raccoons. I have shot, er, three at this point, and the hubby's tally is larger. Don't get me started on opossums. Oh: and there was the hawk I beamed with the $200 skillet (priceless!), in my fuzzy slippers and silky bathrobe. I go to great lengths to spare my girls; you should, too. That raccoon will be back.

    I would work that farm angle fairly hard, though, kiddo!

  5. El... thanks for the farm advise.. I thought it might be kind of fun to set up some sort of motion activated devise that will attack the raccoon if he comes back... It's WAR!!!!


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